Roll Over and Die Already

That the Democratic faction in the Senate decided to passively acquiesce and concede to the appointment of Samuel Alito to the Supreme Court without a fight is shocking and at the same time not surprising at all. While it seemed to be a matter of debate whether or not a filibuster could have succeeded at all, the message Democrats are sending is that they have accepted defeat without even trying to articulate their dissent in any forceful, meaningful terms.

Ours is a nation whose present government is rotten and corrupt. While the Executive Branch uses its "privilege" to scuttle the many pictures our commander in chief took with Jack Abramoff, and deny Congressional subcommittees access to communications regarding Hurricane Katrina, it insists that it is perfectly acceptable to ignore the rule of law and invade the privacy of American citizens as it sees fit. Ethics investigations and criminal trials cast dark shadows over the omnipresent flags. Serious investigations by reputable scholars like Mark Crispin Miller and Vincent Bugliosi have shown that both of the last two presidential elections were fraudulent, and cronyism runs rampant in Washington faster than the makers of body bags can keep up with.

Enter the Democratic faction and its "strategy" to counter the Republican faction's stranglehold on power. Roll over and play dead. A variety of reasons were listed for the decision not to filibuster Sam Alito's nomination, but the majority rang of the same note: it simply wouldn't succeed. Simply put, the Democratic faction would rather be passive witness to the undoing of democratic freedoms than articulate its beliefs against such developments, on the grounds that a failed filibuster would make the Democratic faction "look bad." This is the same sort of weak reasoning that makes the Republican faction so successful. Democrats simply hand over victory without offering any substantial resistance, for fear of looking radical, extreme, or even "too liberal." It's reminiscient of football post-game interviews where the losing players lament that "they beat themselves."

In the movie "The Molly Maguires," Jack Kehoe (played by Sean Connery) complains that his mentor Dan Raines died "without so much as making a sound," and insists that unlike Mr. Raines, he wouldn't die quietly. Despite its misguided violence, the Molly Maguires' cause was a righteous one (and a poignant one, given the spate of recent mine disasters due to deregulation), but even Jack Kehoe knew it wasn't going to be a successful one. The difference between them and the Democrats is that at least they tried to make a difference; at least they made everyone in earshot listen to their protests for a brief moment before they swung from the gallows. It's a shame that the Democrats couldn't have taken some inspiration from that story, used the filibuster as the Molly Maguires used their "powder" and at least went down with some fire on their tongues.

A Playlist

With so much good music out there, it boggles my mind why anyone listens to the radio as their primary source of audio gratification. Why take the party line that is major label mediocrity when you have the option of doing so much better with relatively little effort? While my answer would be that those same radio folks have resigned themselves to a life of passive acceptance of the status quo, I don't want to focus on the negative. After all, it's Friday. Instead, I offer a few things that you probably won't hear on the radio which are in my car at the moment. By no means am I suggesting that these works are canonical or institutional. Do I have better CD's? Yes. Do I have worse ones? Yes. They're just some examples of the fact that there's a better world beyond the airwaves that you might want to check out. Without further ado, and in no particular order, here you go:

Clutch: "Robot Hive/Exodus"- Cryptic assessment of the modern religious establishment couched in terms of antebellum revivalism with driving beats and a guitar player who obviously has working knowledge of Tony Iommi's keys to guitar heroism.

Stevie Wonder: "Music In My Mind"- Early '70's mix down with entirely too much hi-end (think Miles Davis' "Pangaea") . That said, once you reconfigure your EQ, Stevie will make everything all right. Cut right to track 3 if you're second guessing your purchase by the time you get to the car.

Drive By Truckers: "Decoration Day"- Almost makes me wish I was from the South. The musical equivalent of a postmodern Lynyrd Skynyrd and the lyrical equivalent of a Eudora Welty novel. Patterson Hood tells a story as well as anybody. You can check their live shows out for free at www.archive.org.

Isis: "Oceanic"- Heavier than a truckload of Mendelevium.

Henry Rollins: "Hard Volume"- This album should be issued to every male newborn on earth.

The Eagles: "Greatest Hits"- Sometimes you just gotta feather your hair, unbotton your shirt and "Take it Easy." I make no apologies for this. Like I said, these are just what's in my car at the moment. I woke up this morning, and The Eagles sounded like the right thing to bring along. You don't dig it? Then get out.

Iron Horse: "Black and Bluegrass: A Tribute to Ozzy and Black Sabbath"- I like Black Sabbath. I like Bluegrass music. Put them together, and it's like a musical Reese's cup. Their cover of "Supernaut" is worth the price of admission alone.

There you go. Turn off the radio and tune in to some good music.

The Ugly American™

Since global perceptions of The United States are at an all time low, and I’m looking for a good excuse to broaden my horizons, I’ve come up with an idea to capitalize on the situation for huge profits. Aren’t I a good American? My plan is to open a chain of restaurants in hotbeds of anti-Americanism called “The Ugly American.” The idea is to expose people who don't have as much freedom as we do to the benefits of modern American culture in a fun, family-friendly environment.

Here’s how a visit to “The Ugly American” would ideally go. You walk in, and immediately your senses are overwhelmed. Televisions everywhere. All of them tuned to Fox News. Ideally, Bill O’Reilly or Sean Hannity is on the screen the minute you walk in. On weekends, the mood is lighter. We’ll watch a collection of Superbowl Halftime Shows and John Wayne movies; both of which serve as testament to American cultural superiority. Mediocre music distributed by major labels drowns out the incessant whining of the television babble. Maybe something by Mariah Carey, or Creed, or Kenny Chesney. Perfect.

To the menu we go…you’ll notice that everything is fried. I would make a point to articulate in the menu that all the foods served are genetically modified, I mean "enhanced." Care for some Fried Cheese with Bovine Growth Hormone? Try the Chicken Chunks pumped with a blend of antibiotics, hormones, and nitrates we like to call “Monsanto Seasoning.” Oh, and for the kids, a coloring book of the slaughterhouse the food on their plates came from. “You’ll need two red crayons to color that page, Jimmy.” Much laughter, and before you know it, you’re feeling a real sense of “American family values.” To cement that "family values" feeling, your waiter or waitress will occasionally remind you that homosexuality is an abomination in the eyes of God. "Now there's something both our God's agree on!" More Genetically "Enchanced" Chicken Chunks please.

We serve Coors beer here at “The Ugly American,” because Pete Coors is clever enough to use the very nature he’s busy destroying in Colorado right in their advertising. Now that’s American know how, and the beer is about as good as the waste they’ve gotten the necessary concessions to dump into those “cool mountain streams.” You’ll love it Mohammed, trust me. Sure, you can have water, but the PCB test will cost you extra. There is only one other non-alcoholic drink on the menu. Mountain Dew. We treat you right here at “The Ugly American.” No watered down cola for your kids…real Americans don’t waste their time with that shit. You want your kid pumped up with caffeine to the Triple X-TREME!!! How else are we going to be able to diagnose him or her with Attention Deficit Disorder? We’ve got pharmaceutical stocks to think of, after all.

What’s for dessert at “The Ugly American” you might ask? Why, the “Heckuva Job Brownie” of course. Enjoy!